By Emma Jenner
education photo emmaAre you tired of your children fighting? Have you become the referee instead of the parent? Are you asking yourself, how do I get my children to stop fighting and putting each other down all the time?
I’m sure you’ve tried every punishment and threat known to mankind but it’s not making any difference. You encourage them to be nice, but it just goes in one ear and out the other. Here’s are a few tips to help keep your sanity:
Children fight and there isn’t much you can do about it. In fact, it’s better if you don’t intervene. Let the children figure it out on their own as long as no-one is getting hurt. Children need to learn how to solve their own conflicts, and trust me, they will if you let them.
A positive way to encourage children to get along is to give them a project or have them plan an outing. This is an effective way for the children to bond and work together while having fun. After the project, talk about their experience. Ask the children to pick and write down one good point about each other. Try to remind them of all the good qualities in each other.
Always remember that having family time is also a really nice way of reinforcing a solid bond.
That being said, if one child is always the instigator you should take a closer look to see what the reason is for this behavior. It could be attention seeking, boredom or the fact that they are used to getting their own way.
Each child requires equal amounts of quality time and attention from parents so neither child feels left out. As a result, they won’t feel the need to fight for your attention.
Children become troublesome when they are bored. Make sure your child is stimulated emotionally, mentally and physically. Children need a lot of love and affection, age appropriate activities and fresh air.
Teach children the importance of socially acceptable behavior. So on this subject of conflict; teach your child how to share, take turns and explain that they don’t always have to win.
Remember children mimic what they see and hear. Please set an example and show a positive image of how to resolve a problem before it becomes a conflict.
Emma Jenner is a child development, sleep and behavioral expert. She is the star of the TLC series “Take Home Nanny” and founder of Emma’s Children